Carly knows yoga will be helpful for her wellbeing at this moment in time.
Everyone knows yoga is helpful when you are going through a difficult period. Yoga teaches you to relax. Carly knows she needs to relax more. She investigates.
She thinks a simpler, slower version of yoga is best and an early morning yoga class will be best of all, as she will start off the day calmly. Calm Carly. Now, that sounds good.
Carly last did yoga when she was pregnant and that was a very long time ago. Carly thinks yoga will help her develop her inner core – that’s what people say. Carly considers her inner core for a minute. But Carly gets bored very easily and worries that she will let her mind wander during the yoga. Also, Carly is not very bendy. In fact, the last time she sat crossed-legged was in primary school and now Carly prefers to sit like a duck with her feet sticking out to each side. How will Carly be able to get her knees below the level of her hips? She may need a mountain of rubber yoga blocks under each knee to achieve this. She is worried there won’t be enough blocks left for the other participants. She spends most of the class thinking about these people. Is anyone less bendy than Carly? She thinks probably not. She is correct. No one is less bendy than Carly. She makes a miserable face but she carries on. Carly tries all different yoga animal poses. She has to be a dog, a cow and a cat. She wonders if there are chicken, lizard or rabbit yoga poses? She tries to bring herself back to the present by concentrating on her breath. She listens to the yoga teacher who tells her to be a baby. Carly makes a sulky face as she has remembered she hates babies. That is odd as Carly is a paediatrician.
Once she has completed the animals section of the yoga, Carly does some sun salutation dance positions and repeats the sequence three times. She likes the number three. In fact, she likes all odd numbers as she feels they get a hard time compared to even ones. By nature, Carly likes to support the underdog. Even underdog numbers. Then she does some warrior positions. Carly is surprised there are war-like yoga positions. But she goes with the flow. She does warrior 1, warrior 2 and finally warrior 3. This last one is a side angle warrior which can be extended to expose all your organs to the elements. Carly thinks of a crow pecking away at her left lung and spleen as she stretches up towards the sky. She checks herself and agrees she still has her anatomy knowledge to hand. Spleen on the left, liver on the right. Phew.
Then Carly is instructed that she needs to find a partner. Hmmmmmmmmmmm she thinks. Who is the same size as her? She surveys the heights of the other yoga participants. They are all taller than her. Last night she went for a walk with Wendy after drinking a lot of wine and they farted the entire way home. This was following the consumption of some vegetarian moussaka for dinner made with lentils. She smiles at Wendy who agrees to partner her. When she bends down, she mouths silently to Wendy to desist from farting and they both erupt in giggles. This is not very zen at all.
Carly is relieved as she can finally start the last pose. This involves resting flat on her back with her palms facing upwards in submission. It is called the corpse pose. Phew! Carly can do that well. She closes her eyes and concentrates on her breath and what she would like to eat for breakfast. She keeps her eyes shut to savour this part of the yoga class and bring her attention back to her breathing. The teacher carefully draws symmetrically around her face. Carly is overwhelmed and cries. Yoga has been good for her.
The end of Carly does yoga.
