As is usual, Carly is exaggerating. In Jaffa, she has met a few diplomats. For sure more than she ever met in London but still not a load. And although she has met the one from Georgia more than once they are not yet friends. Carly is ever hopeful. And there was only a coffee meet up with the girlfriend from someone in the UK embassy as a one off. And a very fleeting friendship with someone from the American Embassy that Carly tried afterwards to meet up on Thursday evenings when this lovely woman came from Jerusalem to Jaffa. But the war on October 7th, 2023, started and the American woman was beyond busy. Oh, and there was someone that her son knew who worked with him in Erbil, the capital of the Kurdistan protectorate in Iraq. E-Nicola worked for the German Consul there, and she took Carly’s son Tobes under her wing. When Carly met Tobes for a weekend city break in Thessaloniki, she was introduced to E-Nicola and her son. They were a very warm family and invited Carly and Tobes over to watch the Eurovision song contest. Not usually something either Carly or Tobes would watch, but it was a good idea for an inclusive activity during the weekend.
When they were shown round E-Nicola’s apartment it was full of heavy reproduction furniture and many glass-fronted display cabinets. Tobes totally loved all of them and to Carly’s horror (who was in fact an anti-fan of this type of dark and foreboding furniture), he would love to have this style in his own house one day. There are so many things you learn about people that you just don’t expect, mused Carly. The other thing of note in this flat is that E-Nicola very proudly showed the certificate her grandparents were given from the Athens Holocaust Museum for rescuing a Jewish family during WWII by hiding them. Although Carly felt that Thessaloniki was probably one of the ugliest cities she had ever been to and certainly the most in Greece which she so loves, she had a fabulous time with her son, a Barbie in a furry lilac coat and going to the museum of deception and illusion which was mind blowing for both Carly and Barbie!
Now to get back to the diplomats she knows really well. Christina and Jesus. An interesting set of names for committed Buddhists. And yes, they are both Buddhists but they aren’t both diplomats. Jesus has had a huge number of jobs from working in finance, with dead bodies as a pallbearer and now in wind farms remotely. But Christina does really work for the French Embassy. Carly met Christina with her colleagues at a fancy vegan restaurant when Carly was there with her NOT date Eric. Or maybe Carly was there with her gay friends Lorenz and Marc. She was for sure there with her dog Talulah as that is who Christina recognised straight away. Carly likes this vegan restaurant but sometimes thinks they try a bit hard with the food and it can be rather heavy. Carly doesn’t know anyone who really enjoys cashew cheese. However, Carly does love the 3D printed beef. The texture, taste, smell and presentation look exactly like the real deal. Amazing. Carly is still a committed carnivore.
Carly first met Christina and Jesus with their dog Rover as they were out walking their dogs near Park Midron where Carly goes pretty much every morning. It is a stunningly beautiful park and Talulah and Carly have their rituals. Carly allows Talulah off the lead which isn’t allowed and she has had a few fines. The last time they actually managed to run away but this was after the park warden had read Talulah’s microchip, so the escape was in vain. When Carly met this lovely couple with their dog, Christina had just broken a bone in her foot and was wearing one of those nifty plastic boots. No one seems to have funky coloured plaster-casts on their lower limbs now. Just these boots. Carly presumed that keeping people walking must make bone healing better and faster. Carly is a doctor and should know these things. But she hasn’t kept abreast of the latest orthopaedic developments. Lucky, she does now prescribe the newer medication ‘Movicol’ for children with constipation rather than lactulose. She has moved with the times. But even that is fraught with problems. All this only electronic prescribing is a nightmare. At least lactulose is lactulose on the drug menu but movicol isn’t there. You have to remember these wonder sachets are really called Macrogol 3350. Not a very meaningful name. Movicol says it all. To move along the stool…
Back to Christina and Jesus. Things went well and they all met for drinks at the Jaffa port for sunset with their dogs. And they came to Carly’s parties and brought lovely presents and made a fabulous cocktail for the partygoers. They went to each other for dinners and then came the games. It seemed Jesus loved games whilst Christina did not. And Carly was ambivalent but why not on limited occasions? She had brought some board games with her to Israel. But her diplomatic friends hadn’t bought any. First, they played ‘Touring England’. A rather dull game with little skill and a lot of luck. You each pick eight random towns around England and work out the best route to join them. That is the skilled part. The rest is down to the number on the dice. Next up they played ‘Rummikub’. This is a version of the famous card game with 4 different coloured pieces, jokers and numbers one to 13. And Carly, despite having played several times before, still came last. Their plans for the future are to play Monopoly. Jesus had never heard of the game. Christina and Carly were appalled. Carly had a set from her school that they had made on a special anniversary. No well-known names of streets like Knightsbridge and Pall Mall (London game version) or Times Square or Central Park (New York version). Just different areas of the school, the headmistress’ office, the games field and possibly the sheds where naughty girls went to smoke! Jesus wouldn’t be any the wiser. Then Carly remembers way back to her previous girls’ school, where she was caned by Miss Mackie, the headmistress, for some misdemeanour. It was humiliating rather than painful. It’s a shame she cannot remember the reason for the said transgression. Anyway, no more beatings in schools nowadays…
There was one day when Carly needed dog-sitting for Talulah. She knew that Rover got on with her, but Jesus and Christina were new to dog owning. But Carly thought it was worth an ask. They agreed. It was only for one night. And it was a weekend so that meant it was easier for them too. Carly went round with Talulah who was very excited to be with Rover. However, she was even more excited to get her mouth around a soft toy donkey. She had played with it on the previous visit. Rover wasn’t really into soft toys. Not so Talulah. She loved them. But, and this was a big but. Christina knew Talulah loved the donkey but it was a bit ripped, so she had set about mending it. See, says Carly, she is not the only mender in Jaffa. However, the doorbell had wrung, and Christina had forgotten about the donkey in mid repair. And Talulah made a beeline for the donkey and rushed off to play alone with it. The needle was nowhere to be found. It was not on the floor, not in Talulah’s mouth and not sticking out of the semi-repaired donkey.
But Carly had a plane to catch, so had to leave. She told Christina and Jesus in her experience as a paediatrician of children swallowing sharp objects that they generally passed through them without catastrophe. Then Carly remembers when she had left her cat limping, and the vet had severely reprimanded her. Children and pets are NOT the same. But she had an aeroplane to catch and had to go. Christina decided to dismember the donkey and hey presto the needle was recovered! Everyone was happy and disaster averted.
Carly has decided that Jesus has some funny ideas. She isn’t sure if he is actually pulling her leg. He refuses to believe that Carly plays netball. He thinks she has made up this game and it is a figment of her over-suggestible imagination. It is true that only people from the former commonwealth play it, but it is a fun game and although Carly has only returned to it after a 40-year break, she does enjoy it. So, Carly sends videos of not only her playing netball but also some on YouTube because that is where the truth is always to be found.
So what about the future? Christina and Jesus have extended their stay till summer 2026. Yippee thinks Carly. She has persuaded her friends to allow her to teach Talulah and Rover how to use doggy buoyancy aids in their small pool. This is something novel to look forward to…
