Zoë has been petitioning Carly to write a story about their friendship for quite a while. This isn’t quite right. Zoë just wanted to feature in some small way in one of Carly’s world (really?!) famous stories. However, Carly had much grander ideas and wanted to write a whole story about Zoë. But this is a problem for Carly. Friendships are predicated on mutuality and respect. And Carly does quite like to take the micky out of people in her stories. So far, she has mostly been contemptable about herself. It has been healing for Carly to write down her thoughts and feelings at this difficult time in her life. And she lightens the heaviness with humour and self-derision. At least she thinks she does? But, if you start writing about friends, then that becomes a different matter. Carly has written about members of her family. However much she upsets them, unfortunately for them, they will always be her family. She has to be mindful, obviously, about their feelings. But she doesn’t need to consider it in quite the same detail as she does with friends. So here we go Zoë, thinks Carly. She hopes Zoë will take these next few words with an enormous pinch of salt.
Carly met Zoë a long time ago. Zoë lived at the bottom on Carly’s very long garden. Not like a gimp in an outhouse but in her own flat in a parallel road. A few years before Carly’s oldest son, Haz, had petitioned his parents that he wanted to learn an instrument. Carly said “No! You will be no good. I was no good”. And his father echoed the same sentiments. So, they both resisted him learning an instrument. But Haz went on and on and eventually Carly capitulated and bought him a descant recorder. She found him a teacher, Maria, who was ancient and gave Haz interminably long lessons. Haz was, in fact, quite gifted and learnt the tenor and treble recorders as well. He did some practical music examinations, but his school were insistent he learnt an orchestral instrument. He decided for silly reasons on a bassoon. He met a girl who played this at one of his exams. But the bassoon is for tall children and Haz wasn’t. So, he started on a mini bassoon. Then he moved to a short-reach bassoon. And finally, to a full-sized adult bassoon. He was really good in the end. He played in the first orchestra and passed his grade 8 exam. Blah blah blah. The usual middle-class stuff.
So how does this have anything to do with Zoë? Well, she was his first bassoon teacher. Both Haz and Zoë were pretty introverted. And the lessons seemed to go ok. Carly would listen quietly and secretly outside the door. There didn’t seem to be any of that extrovert stalling for time that she used when she learnt the piano. Or she still uses at other times when she feels ambivalent about things. The stalling for time. Not the earwigging. You are bound to get caught out as Carly knows only too well.
At that stage Carly and Zoë got on ok as they both liked cats and music. But it was very much a relationship of employer and employee. Things didn’t move on in terms of an equal friendship until much later. By this stage, Zoë started teaching Haz’s younger sister Boo the recorder. Boo petitioned Zoë that time was marching on; Zoë wasn’t getting any younger and Zoë needed to get on with the business of having a baby. Hey Presto! Arthur was born nine months later! This of course left Carly’s children without a music teacher. Hmmmmmmmmmmm thought Carly. People don’t always do what she wanted them to do despite her being the employer. Her father’s motto kept recycling itself in Carly’s head. “He who pays the piper calls the tune”. This felt musical and appropriate but, in this instance, it was just plain wrong.
After Arthur was born, Zoë and her family moved slightly further away but by this time Zoë and Carly had become firm friends. Their usual pattern of meeting was to go to art galleries but more often they spent time in Carly’s hot tub. Zoë loves to walk. Carly doesn’t. So, it was lucky that Carly had the hot tub and Zoë could walk to her and back. They’d sit in the nude, drinking wine whilst chatting and chatting and chatting. In the winter it is especially fun to run down the freezing garden, though the snow and jump into the hot water. They’d watch the lights in the hot tub cycle through the rainbow spectrum and enjoy each other’s company as their relationship was now on a much more even footing.
But the relationship really came into its own when Zoë was able to be the most supportive of friends when Carly’s marriage ended. Zoë was able to regularly meet Carly as she lives near Crick’s Corner. This is Carly’s favourite coffee shop very near her work. Zoë can pick up the pieces when Carly is falling apart. Carly feels she should be able to put herself back together. She is a medical doctor. In the business of mending people. Also, Carly is very good at crafts so she can metaphorically (or maybe metaphysically??) knit herself back to strength. But she still needs help from others. Even Zoë’s husband Charlie is there to help pick up the pieces. Gosh, Carly really does fall apart. He radios Zoë and she rushes around to help sort out her friend. Carly is so grateful to this lovely couple who are so supportive and able to help her in the way she needs.
But it isn’t just a one-way stream. Carly is able to provide her support to Zoë who suffers from eco-anxiety and has become quite overwhelmed by this. Zoë and Charlie often go to Extinction Rebellion events and, although Carly is scared of very little at all in the world, she is terrified of these events. She is worried she has disappointed Zoë. But she has put in solar panels and she has changed her energy provider to one that is more environmentally friendly. Also, she is forever knitting things for Zoë. Particularly wrist warmers as bassoon players need to keep their hands warm but cannot wear gloves. Some items get rejected for being too itchy. Carly isn’t despondent. A little miffed yes, but she does understand. And the next recipient of these handmade treats won’t know the original provenance of these items. Carly now makes Zoë choose the yarn, so it passes the softness test before she embarks on any new projects. And as a token of her deep affection, Carly has made the mystery 2020 blanket for Zoë. This is a project that takes all year. Funnily enough it is called “our precious earth” – so very fitting.
Carly went on a sabbatical recently. And Zoë was the only regular friend to video FaceTime Carly whilst she was there. Zoë makes a cup of tea and sits down to give Carly her full and undivided attention. She is not flitting around trying to do things whilst speaking which all of Carly’s children do when she catches up with them. Carly feels a bit sick as they walk around, spinning her all over the show, as their phones soar up and away, making Carly feel like she might crash or vomit at any moment. Additionally, Carly feels they are not giving her the appropriate respect and attention. Harrumph sighs Carly. These children only have one mother but hey the young of today call the shots, feels Carly. From now on, especially as Carly knows that no-one can truly multitask, she will always sit down and pay full attention on a video call. This has become of the utmost importance during 2020 – the year of horrid corona.
During these very tedious lockdowns, Carly sees a lot of Zoë, Charlie and Arthur as they are all in the same bubble. She goes there so often for meals, Arthur wonders if Carly actually lives with them. All the adults smile at this. There is rosé wine and sometimes gin and tonics. There is always a very wholesome main course and usually a wonderful crumble. Once there was a chocolate babka, as they had all been watching the Great British Bake Off. They watched some of the episodes whilst crafting. Carly was doing her knitting; Zoë her patchwork quilt using hexagonal shapes and Charlie drawing trees with crows. Arthur is supposed to be going to sleep! With his bear who has a pair of handknitted britches. Made by Carly and for sure supremely itchy. Carly says to Zoë – see bears don’t complain!
Carly really enjoys listening to the bassoon, but she doesn’t want to upset Zoë that she doesn’t really like all the music Zoë plays. It is all very ancient. She likes the opera Zoë plays but isn’t so keen on all this oldy-woldy repertoire. She does go to some concerts, grinning and bearing the music. She has never told this to Zoë who will find out when she reads this story. Carly realises this is yet another weakness – that she hasn’t had the nerve to tell Zoë face-to-face. But for sure Zoë is a Carly story fan and will find out in the end. Carly hopes Zoë will be ok with her spinelessness, honesty and reticence.
But for sure Carly has had an effect on Zoë who now emails her in the “Carly style”.
Carly has given Zoë a new light. It is surprising to receive a Christmas present from someone as Jewish as Carly. Zoë is touched and grateful. The light is very bright and very penetrating, like Carly who has often helped Zoë through dark places and now she is doing so in a most literal sense. Hmmmmmmmmmmm, thinks Zoë. She is lucky to have a friend who can do this. And who seems happy to do it.
So, Carly brings light into Zoë’s life and also colour. There is a beautiful mystery blanket and there have been many other brightly coloured things, often made of wool but not always. Light, colour and comfort. Thank you, Carly.
Carly thinks that Zoë will cope with her cowardice and use of this story to reveal the truth. Of course, she will cope. Humans always triumph over adversity. And it is only the minor problem of Carly’s differing views on ancient bassoon music and environmental activism. And she did tell her in the end. Just in a roundabout way!
The end (of this one)
